Crunchy vs Smooth Peanut Butter


You are undeniably basic if you prefer smooth peanut butter over its crunchy counterpart. Smooth peanut butter is like the cat of household pets; it’s boring. I simply cannot wrap my mind around how a person would like smooth peanut butter–I mean your life has to be pretty exciting, or very boring to be able to sacrifice that little crunch between each bite. When I eat peanut butter, I savour each little chunk of peanut within my creamy peanut butter. To think a person would deny themselves of such an exhilarating experience is foreign to me. 

If you were given the opportunity to skydive, but instead chose to be witness to the person skydiving you are dismissing the chance of a lifetime; and in essence that is what you’re doing to your taste buds. I encourage you to think about that for a minute. Why eliminate the chance to spice up your peanut butter experience? 

By choosing crunchy peanut butter you are letting everyone in the supermarket line know that you are a thrill seeker. Side effects of purchasing this variety of peanut butter may include; stares of shock and approval, a feeling of spontaneity, and a happier life. Your bread will appreciate the itty bitty bites of peanut covering its surface–I promise you. 

In making the switch to crunchy peanut butter, you are committing to life that isn’t for everyone. Conquering breakfast is a hard task to do–especially without the crunchy substance that is a great jar of peanut butter–but, in purchasing the right variety of peanut butter you may stand a chance. 

Crunchy peanut butter is like the quiet kid in the class, you never know what kind of excitement you’re missing out on. So swallow your pride and stop buying the accountant of peanut butters. Your life is sure to be disappointing without the addition of tiny peanuts mixed gently into the creamy substance. 

If you still believe in the consumption of smooth peanut butter, answer me this: Have you ever tried crunchy peanut butter? Chances are you answered no, in which case your argument has no substance. And, if you have tried crunchy peanut butter and still prefer its bland counterpart, I hope you continue to live your life of conformity.