A Customer Service Employee’s Guide To Anti Maskers

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Anti-maskers (or AM’s for short) have invaded our stores, our families and our businesses. It’s hard to watch people in your community make choices to ensure we never go back to normal. But not all anti maskers are created equal. For the sake of your own sanity, you must learn to identify the different types.

 First off we have the committed AM’s. These are the ones who show up to your local Walmart, no masks, bibles a blazing and ready to fight any poor soul who tells them to put on a mask. The errand they are doing doesn’t mean as much to them as their personal freedoms and they are prepared to leave the store if they don’t get their way.

Danger level 9/10, if they won’t wear a mask now, they probably haven’t worn a mask anywhere. You are now exposed you to all those germs. 

Rating: 0/10 AVOID AT ALL COSTS, they will not hesitate to make a scene, leaving you in a bad mood for the rest of the day on top of the increased Covid exposure risk. 

The second type is the nose-maskers. They wear their masks, but whether knowingly or not, aren’t really helping anyone. Nose-maskers have their mask covering their face, but placed under the nose. No one will really call them out for this, despite the fact that germs are much more likely to enter through the nose than through the lungs.

Danger level: 2/10, the only person they are really hurting is themselves, you can’t spread covid through your nose.

Rating: 8/10, mostly nice people, but they get two points knocked off for looking ridiculous.

 

The third type is the Karen™. These suburban moms turned infamous internet figures spark fear in the heart of any customer service worker. If you can spot the iconic haircut through the cat-eye sunglasses, roll up your sleeves and pop on that customer service smile, you’re in for a ride. They are always busy (and never cease to remind you, yes we know ma’am it’s ridiculous you need to wait) and carry a mask in their bag because they have a small window of time to get their shopping done. But before they put it on with a huff, they will talk to you and all of your superiors. Recognizable Karen™ phrases are “Can I speak to your manager” “UNbelievable” and “I can’t breathe with this mask on.” 

Danger level: 8/10, they are rude and pushy, but usually wear a mask eventually because they can’t take time out of their day.

Rating: -5/10, They are stubborn and illogical to the point of hypocrisy. Even if you take the high road, there is no winning with a Karen™.

 

The final type is the chin-maskers. They keep their masks on their chin, unless asked by store employees to put them on. Most of them feel suffocated and constrained by a mask, so they wear them as minimally as possible. Similarly to the Karen™’s, they don’t want to interrupt the flow of their day, so they have a mask with them just in case. However what separates them from the Karen™s is that they avoid conflict. Karen™’s feed on conflict, it’s what fuels them through their PTA meetings. 

Danger level: 5/10 they will wear a mask if asked, but you’ll have to endure a few passive aggressive comments first. 

Rating: 7/10, mostly nice people but I feel like there’s more underneath the surface. 

 

All anti-maskers, intentional or unintentional,  have one thing in common. They make everyone around them shake their heads and say “how very 2020.”